Archive for the 'Lipstick On a Pig' Category

PSA: Phony Pheminists

Terri Whitehouse September 15th, 2008

Aww, how precious. Conservatives have gone and discovered pheminism. A whole week-ish after I called it like I saw it, B. Hussein Osama’s uppity ass went and said that the same old bullshit by any other name still stinks.

It doesn’t just stink. It STANKS!

At any rate, it’s really sweet to see the GOP hustle at developing their pheminist muscles. (No, I’m not talking about kegels.) To the conservatives out there who are new to pheminism, I’d like to offer a very brief rundown of the concept. I understand that you’ve dedicated your whole lives to harming women’s physical, psychological, and financial well-being, so there are bound to be early failures. Pheminism, like any asset worth having, doesn’t develop over night. You’ve got to practice!

First off, rushing to the defense of your VP, as though she were a Damsel in Distress and not a damn pit bull-skinned moose hunter is problematic. Read and learn. No, rape is nowhere near as bad as some boy being a big meanie, but I think the same concept applies.

Secondly, please understand the difference between “feminism” and “pheminism.” Feminists are a bunch of fugly, hairy, man-hating sluts that care about shit like getting paid, and not dying as a result of pregnancy. Real trivial crap.

Pheminists, on the other hand, are beautiful, non-threatening white women (mostly) who collect wingnut welfare and have made hefty money putting bitches in their place. Intellectually, feminists win hands down, but who wants to hang with a bunch of humorless brainiacs? Pheminists are women, so you don’t have to hide or feel all guilty about your deep-seeded innate hatred of them.

Finally, it’s 2008, not 1968. Therefore, it’s probably not the brightest idea to call out supposed sexist attacks by reverting back to racist dogwhistles. While it’s admirable that you’re coming to pheminism in the 9th inning, better not to do it on the back of racism. That’s not how feminism works.

This is.

(x-posted: B&P)

Apparent Transparent

Terri Whitehouse August 30th, 2008

Sen. Mitch McConnell had this to day to the Messenger-Inquirer about Sen. John McCain’s VP choice of Gov. Sarah Palin yesterday:

Clearly, picking a little-known governor from Alaska was an effort to appeal to women voters.

McCain was looking for someone who was not of Washington, who has a reputation as a reformer like him and on the foreign policy stuff, he’s going to say, “I’ve got the experience. I don’t need it in a vice president.”

The test will be when it’s all over, it will either look like a genius move or a Hail Mary that went imcomplete.

So, what do you think? Mitch McConnell: true believer, or just kidding himself because he’s power-hungry? Personally, I thought Sen. McCain came across as less-than-enthused about his own choice.

Appealing to women? I don’t know about all ya’ll, but I don’t vote with my vagina.

Of course, what do you expect from a party of dumb shits that think people are only voting for Obama because he’s black. Talk about just not getting it.

And while we’re on the topic of vaginas, why is Rep. Ed Whitfield so scared of them? Vagina dentata, perhaps?